My favorite strategy for allowing fear, anger, fighting and strife to pass is to zip my lips.
I pucker up. Big time. Something neat happens; my fear dissolves or the person I am with dissolves their fear.
Grievances are aired. But not on my end. Some cry, complain or flat out break down. Anyone angry with me eventually apologizes. But being quiet, I seek no apology. Nor do I desire to be right.
I simply love being quiet because love, peace and serenity eventually overtakes you and I in a state of silence. Expect a little ego chatter at first of course. Ego always wants to get a few shots in.
Why This Works
Arguments, blow ups and all manner of resistance indicates someone resists some fear. Resisting fear influences most mere mortals to project fear-pain onto other human beings by:
- complaining
- whining
- angering
- fighting
with other people.
Being silent in the presence of an agitated person allows fears to arise, to be felt and to dissolve so all parties return to their true state: love.
I developed the skill of never holding grudges more than a few minutes. How? I sit with my fears. I observe my fears. Fears dissolve. I return to the love that I really am.
How About Quiet?
Be prepared to watch your fear manifest as pain, anger, agitation and combativeness, the next time you feel these uncomfortable emotions.
Practice observing these fears versus reacting to the fears by projecting onto other human beings.
This skill takes a while to develop. Be gentle with yourself.
Consider:
- meditating
- doing Kriya yoga
- doing yin yoga
- praying
on a daily basis to expand your awareness. Expanding your awareness helps you observe, feel and release fears in quiet so you do not project fears onto other human beings.
Watch how quickly the quality of your life improves the moments you begin observing your fears – and the fears of others – from silence.
Practice
I never beat myself up if I get angry, annoyed or combative here and there. I am not Jesus. Nor am I the Buddha. But practicing observing my fears in silence and remaining quiet when people react in fear-pain to me gave me clarity in watching my feelings versus reacting to these energies.
Set an intent to be quiet in stressful moments. Eventually, you return to your natural state of peace, love and calm by sitting in silence regularly.
Instead of fighting someone, why not be quiet to observe your emotions? Why not silence yourself to observe the emotions of people who try to get a rise out of you?
I just remained quiet with an agitated person a few times today. Watching reactions versus judging, fighting or debating allowed me to remain serene and also coaxed the other person to share their fears.
Every moment in silence reveals you to who you really are: love, forgiveness and compassion. Spend more time in quiet to allow your higher self to surface.
About the Author
Ryan Biddulph
Ryan Biddulph helps you learn how to blog at Blogging From Paradise.
Do You Fish for One Great White or a Million Guppies?
This analogy sounds strange. But hear me out. Most people seek a home run, swing wildly, miss and live their life without
Why Do We Fall – Motivational Video
Most of us don't want success badly enough to do what is necessary to get it. Want it? Go get it. Decide.
10 Rules for Success: Lessons to Live By
It seems like everyone has their rules for success these days. There's Bill Marriot's 12 rules for success, Steve Job's 12 rules
Passion Plus Detachment Breeds Persistence
Bloggers often ask me how to be persistent. Some cannot seem to find the time to blog. Others quit, return to blogging,
Is Stress Good for Us?
Scientists have found that trees grown in an artificial environment with little stress in their lives grow fast, but are extremely weak
3 Tips for Leaving Your Comfort Zone Regularly
A few weeks ago I chatted with fitness icon Tony Little on Twitter. Yep….the “Technique! Technique!” and “You can do it!” guy.
Are You Investing in Your Career or Business?
Most of us contribute faithfully to our retirement plan each paycheck. But have you considered that there may be much better investment
Family: The Final Frontier
Every non-enlightened human being reading this post has some heavy energies with their family experiences. Family triggers your fear better than any
What Leader Should You Trust?
People look to leaders for guidance, support and love during trying times in their lives. Folks look to: spiritual leadersbusiness leaderspolitical leadersfamily
How Social Media Teaches You Illusion Versus Truth
I live a pretty cool life. I circled the globe for a decade as a professional blogger. I post pictures of me
Life: Secret or Open Book?
Some people deeply fear sharing their secrets. People tend to deeply fear feeling vulnerable, fallible and flat out human. But the opposing
How Meditation and Mindfulness Helps Us Achieve Personal Growth
The beauty of meditation is that it helps us bring our mind and awareness back to the present moment. We spend so