My wife and I went shopping a few moments ago. We journeyed roughly 40 minutes to a suburban area from a rural farm sitting in the least developed area of New Jersey.
I filled the car with a decent volume of healthy fare. But before the grocery trip I felt less meant better. I vowed to buy a few food stuffs to watch my food attachments and to capitalize on spending 10 days at a farm. 50 fresh eggs sit in the basement. Wifey and I harvested 7 more eggs a few moments ago. Peppers, tomatoes and roughly 5 other veggies grow in abundance on the grounds.
What happened at the store? My wife took more time than usual to shop for her grub as I gazed at my hefty bounty, contrarian to my intuitive nudge to buy less and live farm to table, more. During this time of reflection, back pain and neck pain nearly crippled me, building steadily in my being as I stuffed the cart. I felt terrible.
Feeling stiffness seems rare due to my diligent yoga campaign. But while waiting for her to finish gazing through the aisles, my intuition poked through my ego's intense desire to stock up. Intuition told me to face food fears and to drop 5 items. I put apple juice, peanut butter, cereal and a few more items on the shelf. Instantly, my back and neck pain vanished. I stopped deeply trusting ego and its fear-attachment to:
- food pleasing to my senses
- stocking up on food like a nuclear winter awaited next week
Naturally, the fear-pain projected through the body, attacking my vulnerable and attention-grabbing back and neck regions. Facing, feeling and releasing ego fears released body pain immediately. As the talisman of wisdom goes, as within, so without.
Do you implicitly trust your ego? Ego is fear. Fear leads you down comfortable, convenient and suffering-inducing roads. Maybe fear-based choices make for temporary comfort, convenience and a general sense of fear-aversion. But everyone pays the fear piper eventually. I do. You do. We all do. My fear manifested as intense body pain because I distrusted intuition but trusted ego. Reversing the roles removed fears and pains in the moment. You may or may not be shocked to discover how much bodily pain is in mind. For the mentally adventurous, you may even journey down dicey avenues that make you think twice about conventional science and its obsession with externals.
Anyway, stop trusting deeply in your ego and its illusory fears. Trust in your intuition. Listen to the small, still voice perfectly equipped to free you. Intuition goads you to wade through highly uncomfortable fears sometimes but freedom sits on the other side of these strong, heavy energies.
My neck, back and general ego-madness from earlier today proves these simple truths. I am not becoming a breatharian overnight. Groceries for me sit in the cupboard now. But facing a few food fears and overstocking attachments cleared some of these fears from my mind. Clearing a few heavy energies allowed me to laugh a bit at my mild sugar and stocking addiction. I still have some cookies and more than enough food from the store and on the grounds to get me through one week.
Ego is a real trip!
