Have You Settled or Stepped Up?


by Ryan Biddulph

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My wife and I just arrived to our new location in New Jersey.

We will spend a few weeks by the shore.

Contrary to popular belief, the Jersey Shore is not all party animals, tanned to a bronze, speaking in the classic NJ accent. Admittedly, the guy writing these words says “cawfee”, “bawl” and “dawg” because my dad grew up in the inner city of Northern NJ. But just because folks here speak a little rough around the edges does not mean the place lacks a certain level of sophistication.

The nearby town boasts a median home price of $1.5 million dollars, which is impressive considering 10,000 people call the town home. Icon Bruce Springsteen owns a 400 acre farm 10 minutes from our current location. One farm in the vicinity just went on the market for $29 million. Re-read. $29,000,000.

Middletown, Colts Neck, Red Bank, Shrewsbury and Rumson are all highly exclusive, neighboring communities favored by NYC finance honchos, celebrity entertainers and professional athletes, among others.

As a rule, most of the folks stepped up their game versus settling on receiving whatever circumstances appeared to flow their way. The Boss aka Bruce, John Stewart, John Bon Jovi, Debbie Harry, Jim Cramer, Greg Anthony and Kim Clijsters are just a few local residents who raised the bar repeatedly to overcome adversity, to leap over circumstances and to live their dreams by excelling in their fields.

I want to give credit to Don. He mentioned via recent comment on the blog how many people settle. Life seems to mold this crowd. Humanity tends to surrender to circumstances. If everybody around you appears to settle maybe settling seems like the:

  • smart
  • normal
  • sound
  • wise
  • safe

thing to do.

But imagine looking back on your life during your golden years. Do you really believe settling will make you feel happy? Do you want to always wonder……what if?

I recall Marlon Brandon's famous line from On the Waterfront:

“I coulda been a contender!”

Anyone could be anything.

Hypotheticals chain you to the past while forcing you to settle in the moment.

I could have been a model. Agencies picked me out of a crowd to alert me that I had the look. I had the chiseled, square jaw line, big muscles, All American guys looks and a charming smile, according to these agencies. But observing the lower energy aspects of the industry up close and personally pushed me in another direction. I rarely dwell on the past because it has passed and I do not settle now based on what could have happened long ago. Settling simply sacrifices future potential based on past performance. Stepping up to follow your dreams no matter what leaves the past behind to envision a bright, freeing future.

My wife and I decided to step it up 13 years ago. After leaving employment behind we both began building online businesses. 10 years ago we decided to circled the globe. Settling felt like dying to us because you either grow or perish, create or disintegrate.

Move forward or devolve.

Grow or wither away.

Settling feels consistent with playing it safe until you die. What is life if circumstances appear to bully you? How can you genuinely be alive if situations smack you around?

Step it up. Dream big dreams. Picture a worthy life. Get after it. Step higher each day by facing fears. Choose freedom over fear. Lose the idea of putting stuff off until tomorrow. Do it now. Purchase the eBook. Buy the course. Begin researching the online business. Seek the promotion. Work later. Wake up earlier to meditate. Do whatever it takes to step up and away from settling mode.

As a rule, releasing settlers from your life to befriend people who step it up energizes you through osmosis. My wife and I love circling the globe because we meet people who stepped it up frequently. Successful business owners who prospered in the States, Europe and the Middle East inspire us to nudge further outside of our comfort zones.

We recently met a couple who owned a spa-like villa in Panama, a beautiful farm home and boat in Virginia and rented an apartment in Venice. Imagine that life of fun, freedom and liberation. Forget about the things that they owned. Focus on the experiences of living in Venice, Panama and rural Virginia and being able to choose between all three based on your whims.

Doesn't that sound more fulfilling than just working a job mainly to pay the bills until you retire 30 years down the road?

Do you honestly believe you and I were designed to settle?

Step it up!

About the Author 

Ryan Biddulph

Ryan Biddulph helps you learn how to blog at Blogging From Paradise.

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