How Quickly Do You Apologize?

by Ryan Biddulph

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I had a little blow up last night where I went off on someone.

But I did apologize today. Why? Apologizing frees you from the person whom you offered the apology. Being free, you feel good again. Being bound – if you do not apologize – you energetically tie yourself to this person for the entirety of the grudge.

I got annoyed about something the person said. I reacted in anger. After the episode, I took a deep breath, relaxed and felt the oh so intimate and unpleasant emotions of shame, embarrassment and overall regret, arise in my being. I could have apologized instantly but knew that observing my feelings triggered is the wiser move after a little blow up. Wait a bit. Be with your genuine feelings. Apologize if you took your fear-pain out on another human being.

How About You?

I apologize in minutes any time I get snippy with my wife. She knows I am largely peaceful, serene and calm. My apologies seem rare not because I am a special human being but because I rarely take out my fear-pain on other human beings, including myself.

How quickly do you apologize? Do you hold grudges? Why? I have known entire families hellbent on holding grudges for decades. Said family members only hurt themselves because the person holding anger destroys their peace of mind. Did their family members even know about the grudges held? In some cases, no, not at all. Who loses? The person holding the grudge suffers because fear, pain and anger create havoc in your body and mind.

Stop holding grudges. Apologize quickly. Free yourself from other people. Feel good. Feel free.

Feel Free

The split second I apologized to this individual I felt free. No longer did any semblance of pain bind us. I felt sorry to project my agitation onto him. I literally released the sorry feelings the moment I apologized. How freeing!

Apologize to free yourself to follow your passion again. Have fun. Follow your dreams. Nobody grows by being bound to other people through their refusal to apologize. Stubborn people who feel the need to be right never do much of anything in life because these fools cut themselves off from the love, power and eye-popping leveraging potential of humanity.

Stubborn people also burn bridges at all turns. Have you noticed how people who hold grudges seem to be lonely, angry folks? Nobody likes bitter people because emotional immaturity may seem cute in a 4 year old but repels other adults when a 44 year old refuses to apologize.

Be Straight With Yourself

Be honest with yourself. Being genuine makes it easy to apologize because you honestly know when you projected your fear onto someone through some negative act.

Do not bother with concepts like right or wrong. Think more about treating people poorly because fear motivated your personal interaction. See yourself in the light of truth, apologize to people you mistreated and you will instantly feel better by freeing yourself from the past.