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Are You Sure About That?

Guest Author Mari Alonso

What makes you think you are right? Have you ever gotten into an argument with a person who believes they are always right? My hand is raised!

You know what? I say, make new friends! Can’t get away from someone who thinks they are always right? Don’t get rattled, there are things we can do to make it more tolerable.

How To Deal with Know-It-Alls

1. First, Don't Sweat It

The biggest thing to remember is whatever they say, don’t take it personally. Their behavior is totally on them; it has nothing to do with you. You know how they are, so why sweat it?

In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing. Theodore Roosevelt

You have two choices, talk to them, or don’t. Avoiding them is the last choice. If you choose to walk away, please don’t make it so obvious, they have feelings too. You don’t need to be their best friend, but always show them kindness and, most of all, respect. Kindness still matters.

2. Realize they have issues

Their need to be right all of the time may originate in hurt or fear or something else. Avoid arguing at all costs because it will lock you both into a worthless power struggle. Some experts say this type of person has “belief superiority.” Realizing they have issues helps us to take the first step toward dealing with them.

You know a lot, but you don't know everything. Mary J. Blige

No one on this planet is perfect. They have issues and we have problems. Would it be so bad for us to tolerate them like they put up with our stuff? We all need friends. I used to know a very smart guy in high school, a genius type that graduated as valedictorian. I mean, this guy was out there in smarts, and he knew it. I remember being in a class together and he even corrected the teacher sometimes. It’s like that show on TV now, Young Sheldon. Even though my friend was showy trying to one-up everyone, most of us accepted it and actually had fun together.

3. You can't change them

They are what they are until they realize they have a problem, if ever. Many clinicians agree these folks have emotional intelligence and personality disorders. Simply stated, they lack the needed interpersonal skills, and this is their way of communicating with others.

Immature people always want to win an argument, even at the cost of a relationship, Mature people understand that it's always better to lose an argument and win a relationship. Unknown

Since you can’t change them, try to keep your sense of humor. Take a deep breath and smile. Relax and remind yourself that often, their behavior is harmless, and they don’t really mean anything by it.

By the way, this article is about dealing with others who think they know it all. Check out when the shoe is on another foot, when “we” think we know it all. We don't know everything.

4. Can't get away, find a way to survive

What if you can’t get away? It can be super frustrating to always have to defend your viewpoint. They probably can’t control themselves, but you certainly can.

Here’s the thing, if they don’t want to change, they will not. That means “you can’t change someone who doesn’t see an issue in their actions.”

One way is to find some common ground, maybe you can find something to agree with! Find a topic that you both share and try to have a meaningful discussion. The keyword here is “try.”

Be sure to taste your words before you spit them out. Unknown.

How about just being quiet? Maybe they’ll see you are not saying anything and stop?

Sometimes you gotta shut up, swallow your pride and accept that you’re wrong. It’s not giving up, it’s called growing up. Unknown.

What about flattery? They obviously crave attention. If you can’t get away from them, genuine flattery may shock them into not arguing with you.

Are they open to constructive criticism? Many experts say know-it-alls may not have a clue they are acting that way. Huh? Honestly, we can fool ourselves some of the time, but not all of the time. Okay, I’ll succumb to the experts who suggest a gentle reminder to let others speak may help the situation.

Don’t be confrontational. Don’t make fun of their theories and thoughts. This just fuels them to argue their point even more. The opposite is also true. Not saying anything in their response doesn’t mean you agree with them.

‘It always seems impossible until it's done.' Peace is possible. Nelson Mandela

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Mari Alonso
 

Mari Alonso is a positive thinker who loves life and God. She enjoys writing inspiring and thought-provoking posts about improving our quality of life, one step at a time. Check out Mari's blog at www.lifeoutlooks.com

  • Avatar Ryan Biddulph says:

    Super points Mari. I learned from a wise man to say, “You know, you may be right,” when discussing topics with know it all types. Always, their tendency comes from fear and ego so I have compassion for them and simply let them live in their own little world LOL.

    Ryan

    • Avatar Mari Alonso says:

      Hi Ryan. Oh yes, well said! I hope to remember those wise words to say to know it all’s. You are so right that they are dealing with issues and we really need to have compassion for them because not many others will.

  • Don Smith Don Smith says:

    Love this article Mari. One of the best phrases I ever learned was “Sometimes it is better to be happy than to be right.” Not all battles are worth fighting, and sometimes you can win the battle only to lose the war.

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